Cosmetics Do No Good

Cosmetics do no good:
no shadow, rouge, mascara, lipstick --
nothing helps.
However artfully I comb my hair,
embellishing my throat and wrists with jewels,
it is no use -- there is no
semblance of the beautiful young girl
I was
and long for still.
My loveliness is passed.
and no one could be more aware than I am
that coquettishness at this age
only renders me ridiculous.
I know it. Nonetheless,
I primp myself before the glass
like an infatuated schoolgirl
fussing over every detail,
practicing whatever subtlety
may please him.
I cannot help myself.
The God of Passion has his will of me
and I am tossed about
between humiliation and desire,
rectitude and lust,
disintegration and renewal,
ruin and salvation.

Steve Kowitt, copyright 2003 Steve Kowitt