Our loneliness sits with us at dinner, an unwanted guest
who never says anything. It's uncomfortable. Still
we get to know each other, like students allowed
to use a private research library for only one night.
I go through her file of friends, cities, and jobs.
"What was that like?" I ask. "What did you do then?"
We are each doctors who have only ourselves
for medicine, and long to prescribe it for what ails
the other. She has a nice smile. Maybe, maybe. . .
I tell myself. But my heart is a cynical hermit
who frowns once, then shuts the door of his room
and starts reading a book. All I can do now is want
to want her. Our polite conversation coasts
like a car running on fumes, and then rolls to a stop;
we split the bill, and that third guest at the table
goes home with each of us, to talk and talk.
Jay Lemming, Miracle Atlas (Big Pencil Press, 2011)
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